A Clean Slate

Going Into The Closet

Recently, I had the absolute pleasure of cleaning out my clothes closet.  Please assume a complete tone of sarcasm when reading the prior sentence.  Sorting the clothes in my closet has been a project of avoidance for an exceptionally long time.  Why?  Because I hate the way my clothes closet makes me feel…like I am falling apart and barely holding it together which is an accurate assessment of most of my leggings.

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

Second to the above feeling of inferiority is the complete aversion to clothes shopping as I despise changerooms.  Just think how difficult it is to hold yourself to the image of a leggy, slim, graceful woman when faced with bulging reality under the harsh, sallow-hue producing, fluorescent lights of a changeroom complete with floor to ceiling mirrors.  Give me delusion any day…remember, it’s all about perspective.  😉  

As an aside, wouldn’t it be in most stores’ interest to provide lighting which is gentle and perhaps a digital mirror?  A soft dimly-lit change room linked to imaging-editing software would do wonders for their bottom line.  Current changerooms are like the end of an evening at the night club when they throw the lights on and the cold water of reality hits your makeup-long-since-gone celebratory self.

Accepting What Is

Nevertheless, the title of my blog is about acceptance, and in my 40s, I am continuing my quest to achieve acceptance in all areas of my life including my clothes.  Acceptance to me is to meet yourself where you are, say “Self, you are enough” and be the best kindest version of enough that you can be for that second moment.

Acceptance this month means to face head on the challenge that is my clothing, and after sorting, emptying and donating, I was pleasantly surprised how painless the process generally was…but I hadn’t gotten to the shopping part yet.   I was surprisingly ruthless with no more hope of fitting into that mini skirt again one day which tells me my acceptance work has made progress.

Growing Up

Without saying it out loud (writing doesn’t count…this is therapy), my goal over the next few months is to elevate my wardrobe to the level of a 45-year-old woman with transitioning children…not a stay-at-home mother of toddlers.  Long gone are the days of someone wiping their nose on my shoulder, and the excuse for permanent residence in leggings and a sweatshirt is wearing thin.  Though in my defense, my son did use my sweatshirt to dry his hands yesterday when he could not locate the tea towel so may not be an entirely invalid wardrobe choice.

Photo by Cut Collective on Unsplash

Upon completion of clothes sorting, the monumental challenge hit me. A very sorry selection of clothes encompasses my current wardrobe.  Some beautiful pieces but without the accompanying bits to put an outfit together.  Big problem areas were my one belt that looked like it had been tasked with a job too great for its capabilities and some unfashionably ragged jeans.  I foresee a future involving many a changeroom. 

When beginning new projects, it’s always wise to start out simple which in my current mind frame is underclothing…specifically bras.

To be continued…


Anyone else have a particular clothing item that has seen better days, yet you still have an aversion to throwing it out?  I surely can’t be the only one resewing my leggings until they are see-through.  Hey wait, then they’re footless tights!