Stay In Touch

Strolling around the park yesterday, an elderly gentleman and I both stopped at the same time to admire a Blue Heron poised to catch an unsuspecting fish or frog in a lily pad-covered pond.  Continuing our conversation while walking, we kept each other company for the rest of journey around. 

Not as pretty a pond as this one…missing the trash. Thank you for a beautiful picture!
Photo by bady abbas on Unsplash

Talking with the elderly is always a learning experience, I never fail to walk away with an appreciation for the roads taken and sympathy for the roads not. 

Reading between the lines of our conversation, I saw a life where adventure was part of the package with a preference for solitary activities in spite of friends and family.  Fast forward, he shared with me an elderly life with estrangement from children and family; yet, some wonderful accomplishments of travel.  His eyes brightened when he spoke of his adventures, but regret that there was no one to share his stories with. 

My personality tends to lean towards the introverted.  I can easily dive into projects at home which happily keep me busy and give me an out from being social.  However, I had a chance to think about how sometimes introverted and postponing time with friends and family can backfire.  When will there never be an interesting project to work on? 

Imagine a life where your sight is diminished and all your old hobbies are now too hard to do like cycling, knitting, woodworking or gardening.  You have so much time to sit and remember the past….preferably without too much regret and with loved ones around.  It’s the stage of life where I wish one could fast forward to see what old age is like and understand in a Christmas Carol sort of way what needs modifying now. 

In my own job, I see time and time again the epidemic of loneliness.  At first, it’s easy to judge and criticize the children, but for most, I imagine in most cases it’s a little of sowing what you reap…did you invest the time, did you stay close, did you nurture your relationships?  Or were you too busy working, too angry, too drunk or high, too caught up in yourself. 

It’s worth investing time in people…especially if you’re introverted.  Those relationships with your children, your spouse, extended family and friends are worth keeping strong because loneliness is not to be taken lightly.  Loneliness can have serious mental and physical health complications, and it is truly an awful way to exist. 

Just a thought to ponder as you’re moving through your day.  Invest in the people you care about with your time.  Your future self won’t have time to thank you….they’ll be too busy laughing with old friends.

Photo by Egor Myznik on Unsplash

Dear Instagram Men

Being a novice social media user and a complete newbie at Instagram, I signed up for an account a few weeks ago.  I received an outpouring of amazing support, but I also received an interesting phenomenon which had not occurred on my other social media sites. As a polite human being, I have decided to address my concerns in one blanket blog letter.

Dear Instagram Men

This letter is to address all you wonderful manly followers who have messaged me privately with a “Hey” or “Hey Pretty.”  Momentarily swept off my feet, I felt I should take the time to appreciate your interest, but let you know the reasons why I have not messaged you back. 

I assure you that it was nothing to do you with your personally as not knowing you I naturally checked out your selection of 3 to 5 Instagram posts, all pictures of yourself.  Your pictures were very diverse and gave me a complete picture of your personality and heart.  My gold-digging side especially appreciated the picture of the gentleman in his doctor’s gear and I adopted a Southern swoon when I saw the picture of the Admiral in full dress uniform.  For future reference if you are going to be messaging women in the 40s, the pictures of shirts off and beach poses are less enamoring and to be straight to the point…show me the money.

There are things about me that you should know before you decided to follow that “Hey” up with a “How you doing.”

Aside from all the reasons why most people would think it inappropriate to start an internet fling (which I assume is what you want) like being already married, the following outlines things you may need to know about me.

  • While the beginning stages of a relationship are fresh, new and exciting, I am much too tired for it.  My husband and I have put a lot of work to establish our relationship of +20 years.  A lot of sweat and tears has occurred to mold us into the wonderful marital specimens we are today.  If you are confused, let me be more specific.  We can look at each other after someone says something and both have the same thought of what movie quote is applicable to the situation.   We know each other’s favorite foods and how we each like our coffee.  We mostly know what we are going to say next, but not enough where you don’t want to hear it anymore.  When we are annoyed with each other, we are old enough to forget why after about 15 minutes.  This is a delicate balance that has taken time to acquire and the thought of attempting to duplicate it makes me want a nap.
  • All day, every day, I am surrounded by people and animals.  I love them all; yet, my introverted heart craves time on my own to follow my own thoughts.  Having to fit another activity into an already people and animal-filled schedule does not fill me with delight.  I just want to be alone for a little while and overdose on podcasts.
  • I know you probably messaged me because you have a sense of my personality that radiated through the 11 posts I currently have online.  Reviewing the ones I posted for a refresher, you know I am a pet lover, like clean socks and flowers, drinking and nature walks.  A recipe for a solid relationship.  Don’t be fooled.  It’s just a show.  I’m actually quite self-absorbed, go outside because my dogs make me and stole the socks from my children (yes, I said children).
  • If it was in fact my looks that drew you in, please know that it took me 40 pictures to get the one that I am now using as my Instagram photo.  There were no filters used so my fresh happy glow is my own with the help of anti-aging moisturizer and a blot-out-the glow foundation, but I did have to try different angles to prevent the development of multiple chins and crop out my weedy garden.

Now you’re probably relieved that this online conversation is going no further, and for that I am happy.  It was never my intention to hurt your feelings..just help redirect you to another possibility. 

Never lose hope.  Your Instagram fling is just around the corner.

Not yours truly,

Accepting Jane